Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
