i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
