Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
