Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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