Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
