I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
