I like my sex mixed with concussions.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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