I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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