i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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