i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
