I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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