My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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