There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
My ass is underappreciated
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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