So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
