my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
