I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
im holly from the hills drunk
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
