brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
