i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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