So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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