Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
