I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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