i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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