How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Randomize