whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize