Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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