Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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