I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize