oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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