You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
