So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
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