Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
