I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
