I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
