oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Someone signed my nipple.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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