Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
