dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
