We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
he thought i was a dude.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
