Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
