i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize