OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
