i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Is Oprah even human
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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