no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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