Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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