Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize