speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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