Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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