Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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