areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
