But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize