so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
