Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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