BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
